


Thick as Thieves

by Gort



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: (Bobbi's too), F/M, First Meetings, Hunter's favorite story, Pre-Season AU, Undercover Missions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-06-27 18:36:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19796689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gort/pseuds/Gort
Summary: No one ever asks how she and Hunter met, but Bobbi kind of wishes they would.Beta'd by Sunalso!





	Thick as Thieves

It’s one of Hunter’s favorite stories, and it never fails to make Bobbi laugh, which makes it a damn shame the whole thing is classified.

Can it still be classified, though, if the agency that classified it doesn’t exist?

Regardless, the story of how they met isn’t one they usually share, not that many people have asked. Bobbi’s never been sure if it’s because everyone thinks Hunter’s going to launch into some ridiculous, exaggerated tale (which, to be fair, he’s prone to doing at the drop of a hat) or if they just assume it’s not fit for polite company (also fair), but the truth…well, the truth is even better. 

Hunter always begins by reciting a list of what she was wearing. List probably isn’t the right word, but ode sounds so pompous, even if it’s closer to the truth. The dress she’d had on that night is long gone—sacrificed during some mission that’d involved escape via speedboat, which didn’t mix well with high fashion—but the way Hunter describes seeing her glide across the floor in it always reminds of her why, exactly, she married him. His mouth gets him in plenty of trouble, but when he puts it to good use, it’s one of the most devastating weapons he has.

What he doesn’t mention is how, even though she really should have known better, she had no idea he was there for the same reason she was. Of course, he hadn’t caught onto her mission either, but Bobbi takes pride in her spycraft, and to this day she wonders how he’d escaped her notice.

Instead, Hunter always skips to the part where the mark introduces them, and how Bobbi had given him a once over that’d set off every internal alarm he had, except the most important one, and he’d spent the rest of the night trying to figure out how to ask for a woman’s phone number while pretending to be someone else entirely. When he’s in the mood to draw out the story, he likes to add an aside about being drummed out of the SAS if they’d had any clue how easily she’d pulled one over on him.

This is where Bobbi rolls her eyes, because she knows even when Hunter’s preoccupied, he’s still more than capable, and she clearly remembers him carrying on an entire conversation that had nothing to do with her. Their mark, on the other hand, had been much, much worse at multitasking, and had spent most of his time staring at Bobbi’s cleavage. And sure, maybe she’d worn sky-high heels on purpose, because nothing is a more effective distraction than boobs at eye level, but it was still annoying.

At the time, she’d appreciated Hunter’s efforts to keep his eyes above her neck, even if he wasn’t always successful, and the way he’d nervously stuttered her cover name when he asked her to dance. The name changes in every retelling. She’s been everything from Allison to Zelda, but he’s also the only person who’s ever managed to say Bob like it’s the sexiest word on earth so it’s not like she can hold it against him.

He’d been a terrible dancer, which must have taken a hell of an effort because he’s one of the most graceful people she knows, but he’d managed to step on her foot at least three separate times while valiantly attempting to follow her lead. She’d eventually taken pity on him, steering him to a corner so she had an excellent view of the perimeter while they swayed gently side to side, which even he couldn’t screw up. This is the part where Hunter goes on and on about her absolute command of the room while all she can think about is that one moment, where he’d smiled at her without even a hint of a smirk, and she’d wanted to wrap him up and keep him safe from all the horrible things in the world.

Sometimes she still wants that. He wears his heart on his sleeve, even now, no matter how much he tries to hide it.

He’d promised to bring her champagne as a reward, apologizing profusely and leading her away from the dance floor. He’d tried to flag down a waiter while Bobbi kept him from running into two potted plants and a nearby couple, but it was like everyone could sense his unimportance. She remembers him squaring his shoulders and muttering something about doing it himself, leaving her to loiter near the security detail when she should have realized he’d just come up with the perfect excuse to sneak into the off-limits part of the house.

By the time he got back, triumphantly carrying two glasses of champagne, she’d confirmed the presence of at least three businessmen under investigation and one government official who hadn’t been on the guest list—at least, not under his true name. The mark was well on his way to drunk, and Bobbi had been confident her op was running smoothly.

This is Hunter’s favorite moment. They’d toasted, and she’d taken advantage of the moment to spill some champagne on herself. He hadn’t even tried to pretend he wasn’t watching it slide into her cleavage. While he was distracted, Bobbi had plucked his adorably coordinated handkerchief right out of his jacket pocket and excused herself to find the restroom (and memorize the house layout), wondering how someone so obviously out of his league had ended up at a party with those snakes.

She’d left him standing in a corner, clutching two glasses of half-drunk champagne, and that was it. The mission came first, and he’d served his purpose. She’d almost felt guilty, but it wasn’t like she’d ever see him again.

She’d been half right. Those versions of themselves would never meet again.

Hunter never believes her when she tells him how thoroughly he had her fooled, and she loves him for that. Still, he must have had some idea, because there was no mistaking the surprise on her face the next time they ran into each other.

This is her favorite moment. Hunter always waxes poetic about an avenging angel crashing through the window and flinging him across the room while he was just trying to steal state secrets like a good little soldier when really, Bobbi had snuck in through the window, quiet as anything, her batons still sheathed, entirely confident she was alone.

Hunter had already gotten the safe open, and she must have made a startled noise because his head had whipped around and for a brief second, she’d assumed he would go for his gun. He didn’t.

Instead, that smile she’d come to know and love, the one that drove her crazy at least half the time, spread across his face, and he’d straightened up, a classified file folder in his hand. 

“Well,” Hunter had said. “This is going to be fun.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sun sent me the prompt: “Are we both robbing the same house, oh fuck” au. How could I possibly resist?
> 
> I'm on tumblr @robotgort


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